God is Able

When i find a parking space, i will always pray for it. Even when it's actually not something important to even pray for. Sometimes i get a good parking sometimes i will get a further parking but still i'm always happy to even get a parking. Recently i was staying in an inn in Miri and there was no parking space available near nor far from the place i stayed. I kept on praying and circling the area, having faith that God will eventually give me a parking space. I have no idea how long but i would roughly say 1 hour. It was really disappointing because i was really trusting Him 101%. At the time i was almost giving up, i suddenly realise it's not that God doesn't want to bless me, but maybe there is something preventing His blessing from getting to me. So i prayed that all dark powers preventing me from getting His blessing be broken and there as i finished praying, a car went out from a parking space just right infront of the inn i stayed. Feeling amazed and happy.

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. ~ 2 Corinthians 9:8

It's as if God want to say, He will always want to bless our life as we ask and trusting Him all out. But we need to break and unattached ourselfs to all unGodly things or anything in our life that is preventing His blessings to enter our life. It may not be the "evil spirits" but maybe our job? Bad habits? Friends? Something that is hard to let go? But once let go, you will find His blessings gushing all over you.

He is able to bless us all because He is our beloved God. There is no escaping from His abundant blessings. You cannot run away from Him, He always finds His way back in your heart.

God bless you. ")

Who is God in your life?

Few weeks ago, i had a weekend away to a very meaningful place in my life. A holiday, which i really need. I went to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah, just for the weekend (a place where i took my bachelor degree and where my faith grows so much). God is indeed a Great Planner. He scheduled a Leadership Seminar for me. It was two days ( saturday and sunday ) and on sunday night, He arrange for me to go to Upper Room (Young and Adult Working Youth Prayer Group), prayer meeting. (seriously, i didnt planned all of that, i just planned to go to Kota Kinabalu to relax) Haihh. God is awesome.

God really works wonders in my life. I've learn and experienced so much during my weekend away but i'm not going to talk about it in details. During this weekend away, God always reminded me, Who He is in my life. At the Leader Seminar and also the prayer meeting, during praise and worship and the sessions, they will always let you think and declare who God is in your life.

The disciples went and woke Him, saying, "Master, Master, we're going to drown". He got up and rebuked the wind and the ragging waters: the storm subsided, and all was calm. ~ Luke 8:24

My life is a total mess right now. Yup, heavy storm and to the point that i don't really know what to do. I still have my faith, shaken maybe by the storm, and that is when God whispers to me with a question, Who is He in my mess up life right now?

During all those good days, it's so easy to praise God and declare how good He really is but when the storm comes, sometimess i just forgot to let and allow God to be Who He is. I'm in the state of my life that i feel so much pain and hurt. I've never felt this much pain before. Oh yeah! It feels good. No..haha.

The Lord is my Shepherd, i have everything i need. ~ Psalms 23:1

Even with all of that has happened, how can i forgot WHO GOD IS? I can never, and will not let that happen. He is always with me ever since i was born. I can always know His presence. HE NEVER LEAVES ME! HOW CAN YOU SAY HE IS NOT THERE WITH YOU! HE MAY NOT DO ANYTHING THAT YOU EXPECT HIM TO DO, TADAAAAA SHOW HIMSELF INFRONT OF YOU, BUT HE IS THERE! YOU BELIEVE HIM OR NOT, HE IS STILL GOD! AND HE IS STILL THERE! HE NEVER LEAVES YOU!

AND SO TO MY PROBLEMS RIGHT NOW, GOD IS MY SHEPHARD, MY FATHER, YOU BETTER RUN, COZ HE IS COMING FOR YOU! Heeeeeee :p

So Who Is He in my total mess up life right now? HE IS MY STORM CALMER! The One that is always there for me. The One that is so excited whenever i call out to Him.

He showed me a very beautiful rainbow. I've never seen such beautiful rainbow in my life, it was a complete one. I can see where it starts and where it ends. It was so near that i can actually go to where the foot of the rainbow is and there is a whisper in my heart that He wants me to know that He will never let me feel this kind of hurt again. He will make things new again for me.

I have faith in You. It is not strong, but Your Love is. Please provide me with more faith Lord. Bless those who hurt me and those whom i hurt. May it be not according to my will, but Your will be done. Spirit come and never let me go...

Rooted And Built Up in Jesus

When i was still a student, i joined Catholic Youth groups (CSG, Lifefire and Upper Room). Whenever i have difficulties in life, when i need Jesus, these groups really help me alot. They have weekly gatherings which i can go to, to worship God with them. There i have friends who supported me in prayer. I had places to go when i need the Eucharist EVERYDAY. Yes, just to go to the Daily Mass, i would use my campus bus to go to the main gate of UMS and walk outside of my university to the nearest bus stop, to go to Church. Finish attending the daily Mass, i would use bas back, and from outside UMS, i would walk back to my hostel since by that time there won't be any campus bus at service. During weekend i would go to Church and have my confession first before i go attend the service Mass. 

Jesus said to them, "I am the Bread of Life; whoever comes to me will never hunger, and whoever believes in me will never thirst." ~ John 6:35

Faith was available everywhere. i felt closer to God day by day. It was easy to maintain my faith there, with all these around, i just need to have my own effort on getting it. It was easy then than now. Life is so much harder now. I've posted about working in Company ABC before. Well, i haven't updated my working life yet, but for your information,  i'm now working in the Health Ministry and i'm posted in a Clinic very far in a rural area (Rural Z), serving the locals there. Since i've arrived here in Rural Z, for the first time in my life, i feel very very far from God. I have never felt so empty and so dark in my life before. God was there but the walls that i built was too thick. 

With my faith below negative Zero, i felt so helpless. Life was hard. I'm already used to the life where God always help and guide me in all things. Of course this was what i've asked, to work far from my hometown, to serve the people of God using the gifts which God has given me. But i never thought that it was this hard. Challenges came, yeah, it wasn't easy to handle. I know God was watching me all the time, but it seemed very hard to reach Him. I'm not a theologian, so i can't explain it. What i know is that, my sins and lack of faith has made it very hard to reach my God, eventhough He was near.

I know, i can't live without Him. Now i really-really know that. His love is all that i need. I need Him to give me life, to guide me along this path which i'm in. Again for the very first time, back to square one, struggling to break the walls which i built myself. I know and i believe He will be with me until the end of time. Yesterday He said in this verse to me, "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage, wait for the Lord! ~ Psalms 27:14. Yes i will and i will not let myself fall deeper. He is My God! I claim Love and Faith In Jesus Name! 

"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." ~ Colossians 2:6-7

If you have catholic groups, be active! Always give all out to Him! Attend Weekly Mass. Go to Daily Mass if you can. All these can really help you stay closer to God besides your own private time with God! Do whatever it takes to be closer with Him. When we love some someone, we would want that person to love us back. It goes the same with God, He really wants us to love Him back. Well, He died for us. That's how much He would go to to get our love back. Today is Valentine's Day, and i would like to wish Daddy God, happy Valentine's Day because He is my no. 1 lover! 

God bless you. :)

Jesus It is You

I love God, He made me feel that i'm special. He never leaves me eventhough i try to rebel against Him. When I fall and run away from Him, He waits for me faithfully. He really is my true best friend. 

No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. ~ Joshua 1:5

I really love You God. Thank You for loving me as i am. Thank You for never leaving me. You are always there for me when i need You. When no one comes to my aid/help, You, You, You, You, YOU ARE THERE. You always wait for me to call out Your Name. You are always there for me. ALWAYS. I love You God. I really do. I Love You. And i'm sorry for i don't love You perfectly. I miss You. I love You. I want You! God, thank you for the presence, the blessings which you always give me. Thank you for making me worthy to talk to You, to be with You. 

Mighty Saviour, i surrender all things, things which i am not capable to handle, i leave and surrender it to You. Take care of me. I know You are watching over me all the time. I know it! How can You hide Your presence God, when i can see You in all things. Your light is too bright to be hidden. Mighty God, guide me, guide me, guide me...Sometimes I really feel that i'm stupid because i can't handle things which other people can. I always need You. I always need You to help, to guide me. I can't do these things without Your help or Your strength. 

Jesus It Is You ~ by True Worshippers (Favor Album)

Father, it is You! It is You...It Is You Jesus who is always there for me. Mighty Lord. Saviour. Thank You. 

Dengan Kuasa Roh Kudus Mu, biarlah aku rendah di mata dunia, tetapi dekat di hatiMu. Dalam Nama Yesus Kristus, Tuhanku, Allahku....I love You.

In The Wilderness With The Lord

Selepas 10 tahun, ehh...1 tahun lebih bekerja, saya kian masuk lebih mendalam dalam dunia yang penuh misteri ini. (Teruk betul BM ku ni...hahahaha...).

My life now, how can i describe it. It's just normal. I go to work, go back home. At home i watch movies and anime in my laptop. Sometimes going out with friend. Since i dont have any commitment so far, i feel like my life is pointless, lifeless. Sometimes i ask myself, why is it that i feel alone and lifeless eventhough i have a Big God up there. Another mystery in my life yet to be revealed.

I'm (once again) in the point of my life where i dont know what to do or what i want. Being retarded for awhile...hehe...A thought came up to me that maybe its time for me to discern on whatever God wants me to do in life and yea, it's actually a good time for me to serve Him alone, as a Lone Ranger! I have plenty of quiet time now. 

One thing i know for sure, that He already plan something for me and He is directing my life to the path He has chosen. Yes, i believe in that. Eventhough i come to the point of life where i may not see His clear plans, i will not give up. This is my journey in the desert. Wandering for 40 years, that's a long long time (ehhhhh, what am i talking about here...haha..). Though i'm seeing desert everyday, i know for sure that one day if i don't give up, i will arrive at the place where God has promised to me. Yes, He will provide me with everything i need like syampu, shaver, icecream and all the food i can eat. haha.

For forty years You sustained them in the wilderness; they lacked nothing, their clothes did not wear out nor did their feet become swollen. ~ Nehemiah 9:21 

Let this song express my feelings right now.

Hatiku Percaya ~ Edward Chen

See ya'll and God bless.